uh gop' ay

Provided By

life coach counseling therapy emotional healing healer


Agape, pronounced uh gop' ay, is Brotherly Love, or simply Love, in the language of Greek philosophy. This principle, properly understood, is the most powerful force available to humankind, and is, accordingly, the basis for my method of counseling. The few who know this, and fewer still who can harness it, wield the most powerful weapon available for social and personal change and progress.

Love, properly understood, is not a passive, wishy-washy, turn-the-other-cheek philosophy. In fact, it is a strong, sometimes even aggressive approach to people that ensures that the functions of Love, such as respect, tolerance, cooperation, and empathy, apply to you, as well as those you interact with.

Please read this entire web page carefully at least twice, as it presents these and related ideas that, though unique and powerful, are likely new to you.

My counseling and assistance is real-world, reality-based, and concrete. There is a philosophy behind it, as all good and effective systems, but the help and guidance itself will help you concretely solve real-world problems. The assistance I provide is also interventional, meaning if you require or desire that I accompany you as you venture forth to speak to someone with whom you have a conflict, I will do so, or, I will speak with them on your behalf. I will intervene in conflict or a stressful circumstance between you and someone else, whether an individual, more than one person, or even an organized social entity like a company or government agency.

I offer personal counseling and assistance for any life problem--including those that you don't know you have. I am most strongly versed in emotional and environmental health. This first area of health is pivotal, far more important than most people realize, as research reveals that most physical symptoms actually root in emotional disturbances. In my own life, I've found that anger is a colossal problem, as most people neither know how to constructively express, or receive, anger.

Who are you angry at, right now?

My counseling is among the most powerful available, since it focuses on 1.) physical, 2.) emotional, and 3.) economic health. This is the triad of life factors critical to health. Life is a three-piece puzzle--and these are the three pieces. For most people, one or more of these pieces have fallen to the floor, and they don't know how to pick them up. Many don't even know that they've fallen, and many don't even know that they had them in the first place.

With my active, dynamic, intelligent, and loving assistance, based on the unique and powerful principal of Agape, and my own hard and varied life experiences, I assure you that we'll pick them up.

My fee is a low, perhaps ridiculously low, $20/hour. If you genuinely can't pay, I'll help you, anyway.


Images here intend only to establish calm. For example, though there is a calming image of the Buddha, below, I am not a Buddhist, as such.

What I am

I do not provide assistance as a licensed psychologist or other licensed practitioner, which I am not, but as an Agape Master, which I am. An Agape Master is one versed with unusual strength in the theory and/or practice of Brotherly Love, which is also called Agape as you just learned, but also referred to as the "Love Ethic." These are different names for essentially the same thing: "Brotherly Love." What is Brotherly Love? I define it thusly:

Agape, or Brotherly Love, is the active consideration of, and acting upon, the interests of other people, all other people, in more-or-less the same proportion as you consider (and usually act upon) your own interests.

I am also the founder of the belief system Agapology (ag uh pol' uh jee), and its representative organization THE AGAPE ORDER. Again, Agape is Brotherly Love, or simply Love, in the language of Greek philosophy. Brotherly Love, properly understood, is the most powerful force available to humankind, and thus forms the principal upon which my method of counseling is based.

I am an individual who has burned, and burns yet, in the crucible of a world of nonlove. Likely, so are you. While Brotherly Love, properly understood, is our most powerful social force, the opposing phenomenon or force that I refer to in my work as nonlove is our most powerful negative social force. Brothers and Sisters, I can assure you that most, if not all the pain that you have, are, and will experience in your life is due to lack of Love--from others, and from yourself. This lack of Love can originate in an individual such as a spouse, work manager, or simply the neighbor next door, or from a group of persons, such as, commonly, a particularly problematic group of persons called a "corporation."

Nonlove, originating from whatever quarter, is the fundamental reality of human relationships and explains why they skew:  from marital infidelity, to medical malpractice, to addiction and overeating, to bigotry, to international acts of Terror, and everything in between, all are caused by a global order based on profit, and its corresponding, and in fact, symbiotic pernicia, ego. Love simply cannot flourish under such social conditions. Thus, you are never properly loved, cannot properly love yourself, and are correspondingly miserable and plagued with problems of every variety. As just stated, many of your problems originate in the nonloving behavior of others toward you, which occurs because they were never, and likely are still not, genuinely loved by those around them.

We humans are a rather predictable sort: we tend to transmit to others what has been transmitted to us.


I'm Vincent Frank De Benedetto, Agape Master, philosopher, New York Times cited-and-quoted writer, health educator, musician, Silence Activist, family caregiver, and the former resident Leafblower & Community Relations Expert at Noise Free America, a national anti-noise organization. I have a B.A. in Philosophy from Seton Hall University. Links relevant to each of these roles are below.

I'm a teacher in the broadest sense, attempting to teach Humanity how to save itself. I'm also knowledgeable in emotional and environmental health. I've been interested in health for years; as my parents began aging, and I caregave them, my level of knowledge increased further. Besides acquiring information by reading and listening, for years, and today, to radio interviews with top health and medical personnel such as allopathic (i.e. conventional) doctors, holistic healers, and medical researchers, I've had a number of family experiences with doctors, hospitals, and nurses that have been very, sometimes disturbingly, illuminating. I've been ejected from hospitals thrice:  twice for trying to protect my loved one, and once because a nurse administrator reacted inappropriately to a circumstance that had arisen. I've been in battle with the health-care system. Maybe you have, too.

I conceptualize "environmental health" as referring to both your exterior environment such as inside and outside your house, and your interior environment, which is the inside of your body. If local, my assistance will include a walk-through tour of your entire house and property, to give you my impressions and advice concerning anything that may be deleterious to the health of you and your family.

I will also, if desired, colloquy (i.e. converse back-and-forth) with you regarding any emotional disturbance or conflict that you may be experiencing, whether interpersonal or perceived as within yourself, though even this latter kind of conflict likely roots in an earlier or present interpersonal difficulty. In fact, research shows that most physical maladies are rooted in emotional disturbances, which is not surprising given how inept we humans are in interacting with our fellow humans. We continually trip over our own emotional and behavioral feet, causing injury to ourselves and especially others, all the time. The product? Pain of various kinds. This unresolved pain, whether given or received, commonly manifests in this or that physical symptom. I can help with this, as well.

In my previous position as former resident Leafblower & Community Relations Expert at a national anti-noise organization, I assisted many people, providing detailed and extensive counsel that garnered me the kudos of the founder of the organization. Noise problems are actually people problems, so much of my time was spent advising noise victims in the often complex dynamic of human neighbor-to-neighbor relationships.

In my assistance, I will even intercede with, or for, you in attempting to resolve problems with family, neighbors, co-workers, or others. Such intercession can occur by telephone, where I would call the individual/s in question, or in person, where I would visit them, on your behalf.

A large slice of the crucible mentioned above can be found in the content of my two principal books, under development. One is this narrative (presently offline), describing a real-world problem that I've suffered, and much more about Agape and my approach to it, more theoretically, can be found in my other book here. This latter site also presents more information about me, starting in section About the Author.

life coach counseling therapy emotional healing healer

Personal Growth & Enlightenment

Do you seek enlightenment, personal growth, or moral elevation?

Such improvement occurs in our increasing ability to Love, others and ourselves, and you might not be aware that your choice of counselor, guide, or coach can be a powerful assist. This is because inferior methodologies, whether you realize it or not, will obviously produce inferior results. When you walk through the world as a loving being, interjecting nothing harmful or deleterious in your community, work, and other environments, people will breathe easier literally and figuratively. Whatever hostility or chagrin that was engendered by your former behavior and attitudes and the behavior that they generated will disappear, creating a more harmonious relationship between you and others--in other words an environment of Love will be established because you took an enlightened step, that is, a step that no longer causes pain for other people.

Doctor, Heal Thyself

Does my role as a counselor mean that I, myself, have no personal problems? Anyone in a helping profession is a human being and as such will inevitably suffer one or more of the slings and arrows endemic to human existence. I am no exception. In my case, however, I have the unique and powerful principles and techniques of Agape that I've pioneered, to assist me. You can, too.

It is because I've suffered in life, and still am, but found a powerful way to approach this suffering, that I can help you in the unique and powerful way that I can. More pain for me means less pain for you.

What to Expect

Perhaps for one of the few times in your life--expect to be listened to. To be heard. I will likely spend a good fifteen or even thirty minutes simply listening to you. I will ask questions intermittently, as required to fully understand you and your circumstances. We will proceed from there.

Your first thirty (30) minutes are free. After this gratis period, you can decide if you'd like to pay the fee to converse further. If so, you'll click the PayPal link, below and pay $20. We will then converse for another full hour.

What kind of counseling will you get for $20/hour? Shouldn't quality counseling cost a lot more? If you read this web page carefully you'll have a reasonable idea of what kind of counseling you'll get. For further information, read through the other materials suggested here, like my further biographical information, or, simply email me to begin the process of speaking with me directly on my digital Comfy Conversation & Counseling Couch, below, or on the telephone. Either way, your first 30 minutes are free, so you've nothing to lose.

After your initial thirty minutes has ended, we'll part company as friends, and I'll have no idea at that point whether you're going to pursue additional conversation, or not--I won't ask you. So there is no pressure on you, of any kind. If you elect to pursue further dialogue and counseling I'll consider it a pleasant surprise. If not, you'll never hear from me, again. You are in control.

Serious Psychological Illness

I cannot and do not treat such illness. For example, if it's clear because you've told me, or I've surmised it during any of our conversations, that you suffer something like manic-depressive disorder (i.e. Bipolar), schizophrenia, or acute depression, I cannot help you, though I will assist you, if needed, in securing the service of a licensed therapist. What I can do, however, in some cases, is ask you intelligent and informed questions that could be very helpful and sometimes downright revelatory. For example, if you tell me that you've been shaking and throwing up for two days, or suddenly find yourself very tired and depressed, I'm going to ask you, among other things, whether your next-door neighbor just had lawn chemicals applied to his lawn.

Or suppose you suffer from high blood pressure. I will first present you with a holistic roster of methods for redress including, for example, nutrition and emotional re-orientation. A suggestion from the former category would be reduction of both sodium and sugar intake--most people are aware of a sodium-hypertension link but not the sugar-hypertension link. Additionally, with my focus on emotional health, increasingly seen as key even by allopathic medicine (defined below), I would suggest that we engage in a review of your life to root out potentially hidden sources of stress, that could be contributing to your hypertension. I, myself, experienced a revelation in this regard in May 2019, when I realized a likely reason that one of my parents had very high blood pressure:  they worried practically all the time, about almost everything. And frequently, if not always presumed the worst outcome in any uncertain situation. Upon realizing this, I knew that the answer for this parent lay not merely in their daily anti-hypertensive pharmaceutical, but in redress of the deleterious emotional pattern or disturbance.

Allopathic medicine is a medical modality or approach traditionally focusing on drugs and surgery, rather than more natural methods such as better nutrition, natural therapeutic agents such as herbs, and relaxation methods such as meditation.

These kinds of question and lines of inquiry might yield nothing, or might reveal the source of your symptoms, and completely solve your problem. And they are questions, in some cases, that even a licensed counselor, regardless of treatment type, might not think or be trained to ask you. I would still recommend, of course, after such a happy ending, that you obtain a medical check-up. Moreover, if desired, I would assist you in preparing materials, or prepare them for you, to show your neighbor to attempt to persuade him or her to desist from such chemical applications. Moreover, if desired, I would accompany you to your neighbor's house, or even speak to them, for you. This is an example of the "interventional" component of my counseling.

Understand, that ultimately I'm not counseling you to make money, though like everyone else living in a class-ruled society, I can neither survive nor flourish without it. I am counseling you because I'm your brother in our human family, and love you, and thus don't want you in pain. Especially superfluous (i.e. unnecessary) pain, which most social pain is. Anything I can do to relieve your pain, I will attempt.

How to Get Started

Please make your initial contact with me by email at We can discuss options for your free thirty minutes of conversation:

  1. Telephone.

  2. My "Comfy Conversation & Counseling Couch," below.

  3. Visit to your home or workplace.

You can also elect to simply pay your first $20/hour, for an immediate full hour of uninterrupted counseling.

Every moment that you interact with the world without the benefit of Agape principals and techniques, means likely further injury to mind, body, and spirit.


This kitty feels much better thanks to her recent Agape counseling!

About Me

I'm Vincent Frank De Benedetto, Agape Master, philosopher, New York Times cited-and-quoted writer, musician, health educator, Silence Activist (and here and here), family caregiver, and the former resident Leafblower & Community Relations Expert at a national anti-noise organization. I have a B.A. in Philosophy from Seton Hall University.

This site went live on Monday, November 06, 2017.






12 Rules to Live More Like a Zen Monk
Practical and powerful insight for living day-to-day. Excellent page.

The Destruction of Natural Silence
Sound researcher Gordon Hempton reveals how we are losing our natural, and biologically required, soundscape.
The premier U.S. organization comprehensively and powerfully working against pesticide use.

Keys to Good Health
The most powerful health analysis available, as it focuses on 1.) physical, 2.) emotional, and 3.) economic health. Wisdom & Insight regarding health, well-conceived, written, and researched. Small but powerful Links sections. My site.
"We are igniting a movement that inspires parents to protect young children from harmful chemicals."

Noise Kills (down)
Research proves it, and you'd better believe it. Noise means stress--and stress kills. Sometimes quickly; oftentimes slowly. My site.

Unique and Powerful Agape-Based Counseling